I've given my mom a hard time for years about my baby book. The older of my two brothers had a baby book that was mostly completed. The next brother had a half-completed baby book. My baby book was still in the box with the Sears price sticker on it, not a thing written in it. Not. A. Thing. Not long after getting pregnant, I took the book from my parent's house and told mom I'd use it if we found out we're having a girl. I started looking through it the other day and discovered that 1973 baby books were a bit different than what would be included in baby books today. How many x-rays have I had? Uh, none. Not even at my last dental cleaning! I don't remember what else seemed out of date, but I don't think I'll use that as Isla's baby book. I haven't started one yet...I'm actually debating whether I need one or if I should just keep the blog up and maybe have it printed and bound for her at some point.
Any thoughts?
Friday, October 16, 2009
More tears...
I read this on another blog yesterday. It said it was written by "Julie" but no other attribution was given.....
About Being a Mom…
We are sitting at lunch when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family".
"We're taking a survey," she says, half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"
"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.
"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations...."
But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but that becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable. I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die. I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a souffle or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation. I feel I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of her discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is alright. I want my daughter to know that everyday decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom. However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother. Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give it up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years - not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs. I want her to know that a caesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor. My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic. I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving. I hope she will understand why I can think rationally about most issues, but become temporarily insane when I discuss the threat of nuclear war to my children's future. I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or a cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real, it actually hurts.
My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes.
"You'll never regret it," I finally say.
Then I reach across the table, squeeze my daughter's hand and offer a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all of the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings. This blessed gift from God . . .that of being a Mother.
I'm not sure if reading this is what sparked the "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH A BABY????" questions yesterday or if they were there anyway. Either way, I had to wipe tears from my eyes after reading this so I had to share.
And Isla....even though we're questioning what we're doing, why we're doing it, and have 399,423,563,932 uncertainties running through our heads right now, your daddy and I love you very much. All the worries mentioned above and so many more have already grasped out lives. Daddy says I can't put you in a plastic bubble and there was a story on the internet this morning about some lady who got arrested for locking her kid in a closet so I guess I can't do that to protect you either.
Oh, and a warning--your daddy is already insisting that he doesn't like that boy you're going to want to date. That's going to be a tough one for him.
About Being a Mom…
We are sitting at lunch when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family".
"We're taking a survey," she says, half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"
"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.
"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations...."
But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but that becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable. I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die. I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a souffle or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation. I feel I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of her discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is alright. I want my daughter to know that everyday decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom. However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother. Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give it up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years - not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs. I want her to know that a caesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor. My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic. I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving. I hope she will understand why I can think rationally about most issues, but become temporarily insane when I discuss the threat of nuclear war to my children's future. I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or a cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real, it actually hurts.
My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes.
"You'll never regret it," I finally say.
Then I reach across the table, squeeze my daughter's hand and offer a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all of the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings. This blessed gift from God . . .that of being a Mother.
I'm not sure if reading this is what sparked the "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH A BABY????" questions yesterday or if they were there anyway. Either way, I had to wipe tears from my eyes after reading this so I had to share.
And Isla....even though we're questioning what we're doing, why we're doing it, and have 399,423,563,932 uncertainties running through our heads right now, your daddy and I love you very much. All the worries mentioned above and so many more have already grasped out lives. Daddy says I can't put you in a plastic bubble and there was a story on the internet this morning about some lady who got arrested for locking her kid in a closet so I guess I can't do that to protect you either.
Oh, and a warning--your daddy is already insisting that he doesn't like that boy you're going to want to date. That's going to be a tough one for him.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Squirmy girl!
Isla was very active last night during and after dinner. P got to feel her a couple of times! Love the look on his face when he feels her move!
Monday, October 12, 2009
Great weekend!
P and I went on a mini-babymoon in Branson this weekend. With his recertification exam coming up and the holidays, we weren't sure we'd have another chance to get away for a weekend before Isla comes. We stayed in a quiet little B&B that was actually individual cottages with private decks and hot tub. We got to town in time to do a little shopping and walking along the Landing. We turned the temp down on the hot-tub so it wasn't too hot for Isla and sat outside for awhile, then watched a DVD in our room. Actually P watched the DVD and I fell asleep. Saturday morning we went to breakfast at a diner where the wait staff sings while they serve. That was pretty impressive! Our waitress had a beautiful voice and singing didn't interrupt her pouring coffee and clearing plates. Then we met K, B, and the Hs at Silver Dollar City. P and B took the boys on a bunch of rides while K and I walked around talking. It was a gorgeous day and we all had a lot of fun. After we left the park, we all went to eat at a seafood buffet that had crab legs and lobster. Yum!! They went back to Bentonville Saturday night and P and I went back to our cottage. The hot-tub was turned up so I sat on the side dangling my legs while P was immersed. Then movie/sleep time again. Sunday morning was a lazy morning, then the drive home. My parents were here when we got back--a friend had given us a rocker for Isla's room and they picked it up for me. What a weekend!
Today was a holiday so I did a little shopping--I bought some gingham for curtains and some fleece to make a couple blankets--I'll work on those this weekend. I also went grocery shopping, did laundry, made lasagna, and took the dogs for a walk. Little rest today!
I've been having issues with my tummy getting sore when I walk very much so we bought a support belt when we got to Branson--I'd ordered one last weekend but it didn't in before we left. With the belt, I didn't have any trouble walking around all day Saturday. I didn't have it on good for our walk today but it wasn't long enough to bother me anyway. I have an appointment to start personal training in the water this week--hopefully that'll get me exercising more again. I haven't been on a scale for two weeks since my last doctor's appointment. I feel like I'm doing better with food, but I'm scared to see the scale!
More later--
Today was a holiday so I did a little shopping--I bought some gingham for curtains and some fleece to make a couple blankets--I'll work on those this weekend. I also went grocery shopping, did laundry, made lasagna, and took the dogs for a walk. Little rest today!
I've been having issues with my tummy getting sore when I walk very much so we bought a support belt when we got to Branson--I'd ordered one last weekend but it didn't in before we left. With the belt, I didn't have any trouble walking around all day Saturday. I didn't have it on good for our walk today but it wasn't long enough to bother me anyway. I have an appointment to start personal training in the water this week--hopefully that'll get me exercising more again. I haven't been on a scale for two weeks since my last doctor's appointment. I feel like I'm doing better with food, but I'm scared to see the scale!
More later--
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Projects...
P put the crib together today.
I added some stuff to our Toys R Us registry yesterday and while I was in the store I picked up some plain bibs to decorate. The pink one says Isla in different fonts. The green one says 'Lil Sweet, then has a picture of a pea (one of the docs P works with calls him Sweet P). One says if you're reading this, hand me to grandpa. One says Jesus loves me and so does Daddy.
The white bib has a picture of the US flag and the Puerto Rican flag and says Made in Puerto Rica with American parts. The yellow bib has the Puerto Rican flag on it and says Puerto Rican baby.
Here's the wall hanging I made last weekend.
And the Halloween t-shirt I made for me. I found the design online and stole it to make it myself. It took me much longer to make than it should have, but finally I realized I was reading the directions from the transfer paper for light colored fabrics and the directions for dark fabrics is significantly different.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Weekend update....
P's been sick all weekend so not a lot has gotten done around the house. He did finish the trim in our bedroom and we took a dresser downstairs to the storage room so our bedroom feels bigger and the bassinet won't feel so cramped.
Since so much of what I feel like needs to be done around here depends on P doing some things first--or at least helping me with things, I did a craft project yesterday. Pictures to come. I'd ordered a transfer that says "My Price Charming did come...His name is Daddy!" so it put that on a board yesterday and decorated it.
P was able to go out and about for a little while today and we went to Target to do our baby registry. Gotta love shopping without spending any money. While we were there, we picked up a baby gift for some friends.
Gotta go--there's an obnoxious dog talking to me. Gotta send him outside.
Since so much of what I feel like needs to be done around here depends on P doing some things first--or at least helping me with things, I did a craft project yesterday. Pictures to come. I'd ordered a transfer that says "My Price Charming did come...His name is Daddy!" so it put that on a board yesterday and decorated it.
P was able to go out and about for a little while today and we went to Target to do our baby registry. Gotta love shopping without spending any money. While we were there, we picked up a baby gift for some friends.
Gotta go--there's an obnoxious dog talking to me. Gotta send him outside.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Bizarro thoughts, bizarro dreams
The dream first. Last night (actually this morning between potty break #3 and potty break #4), I dreamt that my grandpa got his nose pierced and came to see me wearing one of those belly button bar thingys in his nose. I can't remember if he was wearing overalls or not, I was too distracted by the nose. (I don't think I've ever seen my grandpa wear anything but overalls. Usually without a shirt, but if he's coming somewhere he'll put a shirt on over the outside of the overalls, leaving most of the buttons undone of course).
Bizarro thoughts. Remember the movie Short Circuit with Ally Sheedy and the robot? The robot was the 5th one produced or something and was called #5 (I think his name was also Johnny). Anyway, the often repeated line in the movie was "#5 is ALIVE." This is pregnancy #5 for us. #5 is ALIVE!
Gotta get the rambunctious dog to doggy day care and get to work.
Bizarro thoughts. Remember the movie Short Circuit with Ally Sheedy and the robot? The robot was the 5th one produced or something and was called #5 (I think his name was also Johnny). Anyway, the often repeated line in the movie was "#5 is ALIVE." This is pregnancy #5 for us. #5 is ALIVE!
Gotta get the rambunctious dog to doggy day care and get to work.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Waterworks....
So the waterworks have been flowing the last few days. This morning I started crying on the way to work as this song played on the radio:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8UpaifPbqI
Love it!
The lyrics so my little Isla can read them some day when the You Tube video is long gone....
The Words I Would Say by Sidewalk Prophets
Three in the morning,
And I'm still awake,
So I picked up a pen and a page,
And I started writing,
Just what I'd say,
If we were face to face,
I'd tell you just what you mean to me,
I'd tell you these simple truths,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,
Last time we spoke,
You said you were hurting,
And I felt your pain in my heart,
I want to tell you,
That I keep on praying,
Love will find you where you are,
I know cause I've already been there,
So please hear these simple truths,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,
From one simple life to another,
I will say,
Come find peace in the Father,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
Thank God for each day,
His love will find a way,
These are the words I would say
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8UpaifPbqI
Love it!
The lyrics so my little Isla can read them some day when the You Tube video is long gone....
The Words I Would Say by Sidewalk Prophets
Three in the morning,
And I'm still awake,
So I picked up a pen and a page,
And I started writing,
Just what I'd say,
If we were face to face,
I'd tell you just what you mean to me,
I'd tell you these simple truths,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,
Last time we spoke,
You said you were hurting,
And I felt your pain in my heart,
I want to tell you,
That I keep on praying,
Love will find you where you are,
I know cause I've already been there,
So please hear these simple truths,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,
From one simple life to another,
I will say,
Come find peace in the Father,
Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You're going to do great things,
I already know,
God's got His hand on you so,
Don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don't forget why you're here,
Take your time and pray,
Thank God for each day,
His love will find a way,
These are the words I would say
Sunday, September 13, 2009
More pictures....
The onesies I made this weekend. Took awhile to figure out how to print "mirror image" on our printer, but once I figured that out I was good to go.
And still more pictures....the nursery
Ok, I don't know how to do fancy slide shows or anything like that. I can't even upload more than a few pictures at a time, but here goes. Here are some pictures of the nursery in progress. Looks a lot better in these pictures than it does right now--most of the contents of the computer room are piled in there now so the carpet in that room can be changed out. The Puerto Rican vacation pictures are staying in the nursery since that's where Isla came from.
Just hanging out....
Isla, P, and I have just been hanging out. My dad installed the carpet in the nursery on ultrasound day and it looks great. We've moved the stuff out of the computer room and will tear up that old carpet today so he can install the new carpet in there tomorrow. Ok, P will take out the old carpet...Mom, Dad, P, and P's mom all are commenting on things I shouldn't be doing. I'll help take out the padding and I'll sit in the floor and pull up the staples. Nothing too exertional for me and Isla.
I made monthiversary onesies yesterday. I downloaded the template from Good Food, Good Friends, Good Life, changed some colors (made some more girly!) and made some other modifications (like instead of 0 months, I have Fresh Out of the Womb). Somehow I managed to not buy 0-3 month onesies (and I'm not buying NB stuff for Isla--my family tends to have big babies!) so I still need to do the smallest ones. Oh, I also made a onesie that says "Mommy & Daddy's Lil' vacation souvenir."
Mom and I went to Carters Friday afternoon and I bought a few things. I also bought a few items for next summer at Macys yesterday--HUGE sale. I have to stop buying clothing, but its so much fun! Isla has a cute little denim skirt (which violates my and A's rule that it doesn't matter what size you are, nothing should be worn that is wider than it is long), a soft pink winter coat, and so many cute sleepers. I should take pictures of some of the clothes and the onesies to post. Maybe I'll do that this afternoon.
Time to get ready for church! More later.
I made monthiversary onesies yesterday. I downloaded the template from Good Food, Good Friends, Good Life, changed some colors (made some more girly!) and made some other modifications (like instead of 0 months, I have Fresh Out of the Womb). Somehow I managed to not buy 0-3 month onesies (and I'm not buying NB stuff for Isla--my family tends to have big babies!) so I still need to do the smallest ones. Oh, I also made a onesie that says "Mommy & Daddy's Lil' vacation souvenir."
Mom and I went to Carters Friday afternoon and I bought a few things. I also bought a few items for next summer at Macys yesterday--HUGE sale. I have to stop buying clothing, but its so much fun! Isla has a cute little denim skirt (which violates my and A's rule that it doesn't matter what size you are, nothing should be worn that is wider than it is long), a soft pink winter coat, and so many cute sleepers. I should take pictures of some of the clothes and the onesies to post. Maybe I'll do that this afternoon.
Time to get ready for church! More later.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Coming soon.....
Isla Beth H...it's a girl-flavored baby!!!!
She was dancing around through the entire ultrasound. The tech had a hard time getting some of the measurements--she never did get a good picture of the heart so I may have to go back in a few weeks (darn!). Woo Hoo!!!
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Countdown!
24 hour countdown! Tomorrow is the day for THE ultrasound. I pray everything looks good and that Rico cooperates by flashing whatever goods he/she has!
Movement is still sporadic. I'm starting to feel it some while I'm sitting doing other things and not just when I'm laying down perfectly still and concentrating. Friday night I was taking a turn driving on the way to see my brother and sister-in-law and it suddenly felt like Rico punched (ok, he's tiny so it was more than a nudge, but still…) my innards. One day this weekend I was feeling a little bit of fluttering about and P started rubbing by belly and it seemed to make him move more. Yeah--an interactive babe!
I'll definitely update tomorrow!
Movement is still sporadic. I'm starting to feel it some while I'm sitting doing other things and not just when I'm laying down perfectly still and concentrating. Friday night I was taking a turn driving on the way to see my brother and sister-in-law and it suddenly felt like Rico punched (ok, he's tiny so it was more than a nudge, but still…) my innards. One day this weekend I was feeling a little bit of fluttering about and P started rubbing by belly and it seemed to make him move more. Yeah--an interactive babe!
I'll definitely update tomorrow!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
I blame it on pregnancy brain....
I left work early this afternoon so I could take one of the pups to the vet. He's been licking his paws a lot and I noticed yesterday that they're starting to get pink and tender. So I leave work and start to head toward Jackson to the vet's office. Luckily I realized before getting on the interstate that PERHAPS I should go home and get the dog first.
Bump was reasonably well behaved at the vet's office, but he seemed to either recognize the word "shot" or the site of the syringe and bottle (usually he's not that smart). When K knelt down in the floor to come near him with the syringe, Bump had positioned himself behind my legs. Nice. We pulled him out, he got his shot of steroids (it's probably an allergy thing), K warned me that Bump may be more thirsty than usual and not to be surprised if he has an accident, and we went on our way.
The plan was to take Bumper back home, change clothes, and meet L at the gym in the warm water pool. I put on my suit, some shorts, tshirt, and sandals and headed to the gym. I got to the end of the street and realized that MAYBE I should take a bra and a pair of panties to put on after I get out of the water so I can leave the gym respectably.
Really, these things have to be due to pregnancy brain. That or I'm turning into my mother.
Bump was reasonably well behaved at the vet's office, but he seemed to either recognize the word "shot" or the site of the syringe and bottle (usually he's not that smart). When K knelt down in the floor to come near him with the syringe, Bump had positioned himself behind my legs. Nice. We pulled him out, he got his shot of steroids (it's probably an allergy thing), K warned me that Bump may be more thirsty than usual and not to be surprised if he has an accident, and we went on our way.
The plan was to take Bumper back home, change clothes, and meet L at the gym in the warm water pool. I put on my suit, some shorts, tshirt, and sandals and headed to the gym. I got to the end of the street and realized that MAYBE I should take a bra and a pair of panties to put on after I get out of the water so I can leave the gym respectably.
Really, these things have to be due to pregnancy brain. That or I'm turning into my mother.
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