Everyone is asking if I'm ready for Isla to be here. Such a tough question. I can't wait to meet her and all the selfish things like I can't wait to move normally again and I can't wait to not have to pee every 45 minutes. But I don't want to not feel her moving around inside of me anymore (although I can do without the panic of wondering if I've felt her enough on any given day). I want to share her with her family and introduce her to all her friends, but I don't want to not have her all to myself anymore. I want her out here because I'm so worried about something happening to her before she gets here, but I also know I can protect her better now than I'll ever be able to again--this is as close to keeping her in a bubble as I'll be able to do. The realization that she's coming out and it IS going to HURT is setting in. So are all the worries and fears about what we're going to do with her when she gets here. I suppose all these things are natural. Women have been doing this for centuries.
Meanwhile, I was 1 cm dilated Monday. I know that doesn't mean anything--I could walk around like that for weeks and weeks. Dr S said the menstrual-type cramps I've been feeling are Braxton Hicks. Those are getting more frequent. We went up to the hospital Monday night for a NST because I couldn't feel much movement. Once on the monitor we could hear plenty, but I still couldn't feel it. I guess she was just swimming in the middle of her pool. The last two days she's been a good girl and swimming at the edge where I can feel lots of movement. Next Tuesday I go back to the clinic for another ultrasound, see how the amniotic fluid levels are, how big this little girl is getting, and to see what they say about the swelling issues. I guess whatever they say, Isla will be here within a month or so! Ready. Or. Not.
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