Sigh.

Almost 2 weeks have passed since my last update. We're still struggling with eating. Yesterday we switched to Nutramigen, a hypoallergenic formula that should digest more easily. I pray that it helps our little girl find an appetite. So far she's eaten a little more in the past 24 hours since we switched than she had been but she's just eating an ounce or 2 here and there. Her sleep cycle is messed up though--we got back from vacation yesterday morning, she slept all afternoon, then went to bed at 6:30. Needless to say, her new habit of getting up only once a night, inhaling a bottle, and going back to sleep didn't happen last night. Hopefully after a good nap (she's asleep now, finally!) she'll be good and hungry.

Tomorrow we go back to see the SLP about sucking. She's made a lot of improvement in this area in the past 3 weeks. She can down a 4 ounce bottle in 10-15 minutes in the middle of the night and (most of the time) is doing better with her other bottles also. Unfortunately she's developed a habit of drinking 2 ounces then screaming at us. That's part of the reason we switched to the special formula--maybe the other formula isn't digesting well. We'll give this one 2 weeks and if she doesn't do better with it than the last one, we'll switch back because this one is really expensive. We also go back to the doctor tomorrow for a weight check. She's gained some since last time but not as much as we would have hoped, especially since we were mixing her formula to a higher calorie recipe. Mommy may ask about some happy pills too. I'm much less stressed than I was when I was pumping but I'm still having a lot of emotional lability. I hate the idea of taking anything though--those meds frequently have appetite side effects that I don't need--Isla needs an increased appetite, I don't!

Tuesday I have to go back to work. I really have mixed feelings about this. I'm so grateful I had 12 weeks to stay home and I really don't think I could be a stay at home mommy all the time but it seems like I'm just starting to get to know her. I'm sure I'll come home at lunch on Tuesday. I'm going to TRY to go to the gym after work and then I'll come home and spend all evening with my little girl. Another problem with going back to work is that I get bored there which makes the days drag by and will just remind me how much I miss Isla. Gotta talk to the powers that be about finding something to occupy my time more.